What Do I Do With It?...

Request: "ways to absorb new, unbelievable situations you witness"
Dedication: Miss Laura

I am doing my chaplaincy internship at a children's home. The kids there are sometimes homeless, sometimes removed from their parents' custody, sometimes abandoned, some are in treatment for their behavior. Many of the kids are abused. Many come from situations of severe poverty. Many come from cultures much different from my own. Many have mental health issues. Many have developmental issues. They all need to be loved. So how do I deal with such unbelievably heartbreaking life stories?

Well, I hear them. I understand that they are true and suck. I understand my role is to not repeat the neglect, or disregard these people, or refuse to listen. My role is to be patient, to keep my promises, to not repeat the disappointments brought on by others (especially adults). I know my role is not to change it or fix it, because I cannot. My job is to understand the cycle of poverty, abuse, neglect, addiction. My job is to process critically the systemic problems of our country and cultures, which have dire consequences for children and families such as these. My job is to pray. My responsibility is to know that change happens slowly, but there is hope for these youth.

Every incident I see or hear about adds a piece to the infinitely complex puzzle of who each child is and why he or she is in the home. Each of these puzzle pieces informs a larger view of the systemic phenomena influencing the delicate lives of our precious children. I don't pack this information into a locked drawer - I tack it up on a giant wall chart which describes the functional hells of this world. I use this information to find out where the cracks are for life to sneak in. I discover where hope is planted and pray and pray in my own hope of nurturing something invisible. I pray with the most powerful light and nourishment that can be mustered up. I pray that God's perfect love will take over and be sustaining life.