Tuesday, March 02, 2010

Death

by Jenni

I’ll be honest. I’m glad February is over. Hands down, it was the worst month of my life. Last Monday, my mom died after a short yet ferocious battle with breast cancer. Her funeral was Friday.

I’ve never experienced death this close. I’ve never had to help plan a funeral and deal with such profound grief. I’ve never had to sit by—utterly helpless—while my father faces a loss bigger than I can imagine. I’ve never had to hold my child as he cried over the loss of someone truly special to him. I’ve had to start living my life constantly on the verge of tears as I find myself thinking, “I can’t wait to tell my mom about this…” and realizing she’s not there to tell.

In my upcoming Life@Luther entries, I want to share the places in this experience where I have seen God at work after my mother’s death. It won’t lessen my grief. I will still probably spend a long time living on the verge of tears as my family and I adjust to the constant missing presence in our lives. But I think it will help. Thanks for being my sounding board.

7 Comments:

Blogger Eric said...

Prayers, blessings, and peace to you and your family, Jenni, during the grieving process. We are all so sorry for your loss.

3/02/2010 02:38:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

So sorry Jenni at the death of your mom. Our prayers and best wishes to you in this difficult mourning time.
The peace of the Lord be upon you!

Margaret

3/02/2010 02:54:00 PM  
Anonymous Christina said...

Jenni, Know you are surrounded with prayers, in your grief and in the loss that you are all feeling so deeply.

3/02/2010 06:33:00 PM  
Blogger Mary said...

know that you're in my prayers, and let us be God's loving arms enfolding you...

3/03/2010 11:54:00 AM  
Anonymous Linda said...

A loss like no other - praying for you on the death of your mom. Remember the love and memories you share - laugh, cry and let those around you surround you with their love.

3/03/2010 12:47:00 PM  
Anonymous Susan said...

Jenni,

I cannot begin to know the depth of your grief, but knowing how often I call my own mother, I can picture that scenario very clearly. May all of your grieving family feel God's presence in your life at this difficult time and may you come to know God's peace.

3/03/2010 02:28:00 PM  
Blogger Amber said...

Jenni, so incredibly sad to hear about your mother. Praying for you and your family as you face the day to day stuff without her.

3/03/2010 05:59:00 PM  

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